Special Thanks to Everyone at Rel Community

This past Sunday night at Rel Community, our students and group leaders threw Alicia and I a surprise party for Baby Zeke. It was so thoughtful of them. Here are some thoughtful things they did, highlights from the night, and some other things I noticed:

• The students made a scrap book for us. Each student did a page or two. It turned out pretty sweet and now we have a way to look back at past Student Ministry Events. It's in my office right now on the coffee table, but It's gonna be great to have around the house to show friends and family different things our students have done.
• It's also kind of creepy that the students were able to create a scrapbook of most of our lives just from the pictures we have up on Facebook. I'm surprised that George Orwell didn't specifically name Big Brother Facebook in his classic novel 1984.
• The students decorated, brought baked goods and balloons. It was one happening place on Sunday night.
• The activity for the night was Price is Right: Baby Style. Not only was this hilarious, but we also learned that Turner Seal pales (yes that's also a tanning joke) in comparison to Bob Barker.
• Probably the biggest thing that blessed me on Sunday night was realizing the wonderful family God has put around us here at Parkside. It was so thoughtful for our students and group leaders to do something like that on their own and they did it in such a loving and thoughtful way. I can't wait to introduce our new son to each of them.

And yes, as I write this my wife has yet to go into labor, and I have yet to get to meet my son for the first time. The due date is April 1st, just a few days away. Be praying for a safe, healthy delivery for mom and baby. Oh and be praying that he gets here sooner rather than later!

Spending Time with Students

In the summer of 2006, I had an awesome opportunity to do a 3 month internship with Canyon Ridge Christian Church in Las Vegas. The entire experience was a wonderful one. I learned so much from their staff and from all the students I got to meet as well. In fact, it has been incredible how I've gotten to see the Junior High Students that I invested in that summer, grow up, graduate and do some pretty cool things.

There are a lot of great, funny, and interesting stories I could share with everyone. Just ask PJ, Josh, or Jordan about having to change a tire. My first day at Canyon Ridge was jam packed too. It started with me taking a Red Eye Flight from Dayton to Las Vegas, and it ended with me throwing up in my summer host's house (Sorry Kerry) from a combination of jet lag and bad chicken from Red Robin (Yummmm?). Don't worry this isn't going to be a Vomit Play by Play Post.

The first thing that I did at Canyon Ridge after meeting some of their great staff and getting a tour of everything, was I made some phone calls. The Student Ministry had a summer party party coming up and so they wanted me to make some calls and remind students they should come. I felt like a telemarketer. I was making cold calls and hoping no one said, "Matt from Canyon Ridge? I know Duncan, and I know Peak, but who are you?" (See Acts 19:15-16) Thankfully that didn't happen, but something even more intimidating did. I called a number and asked if the student's name I had listed was at home. I got an answer I didn't expect, "Sir, how did you get this number? The teen you named has been moved recently by Children's Services. The case is still ongoing."

After a silence that seemed to last a lifetime. I fumbled around trying to let the person know that I didn't know how I got this number, and that I was only an intern at my first day of work. I think the person on the other end could tell I was flummoxed, because they graciously let me say goodbye. I was petrified. I honestly couldn't tell you about any of the other calls I made the rest of that afternoon. Looking back on that story now a huge lesson pops out to me.

It is easy when you work with Teens in Student Ministry, or as a Teacher to forget all the things that go on in student's everyday lives. As dumb as it sounds its really easy to get sucked into this virtual reality where we think that really the only thing going on in our students' lives are the things they tell us about or do with us. We forget that they have Grandparents in the hospital, college applications that are being completed and filled out, games to play in, and homework to do.  We will make a phone call or visit a family and be floored to find out something crazy has happened. Really though, students spend around 2 hours with us each week, what about the other 166 hours? We can't honestly think that students go home and twiddle their thumbs until the next Student Ministry event. A lot of us tend to run our ministry/lives that way.

One of the hardest things for me in my Life Group of friends and other couples that meet every week is for me to remember to check in with them during the week and spend time with them during the week. They are really good friends who I really care about. I'll even make plans to call, text, or hang out with them, but before I know it, its been a week and I haven't talked to them at all.

It is just easy to forget that students have as much going on as we do. Sometimes we are surprised to find out the pain they are going through or the struggles they have going on week to week. It is hard to keep that in the forefront of our mind. Maybe we need to spend more time listening, so we get a chance to hear about all that they have going on from week to week. I'll have to tell you the story of me yakking some other time.

Monday Morning

This was an incredible weekend for me for a lot of reasons. First off, my dad and I got to do something incredible. We got to go to that town up north and watch Ohio State beat Mich.again. There are so many stories from that alone that I would love to share, but I am sure none of you are all that interested so I'll keep my thoughts on it brief. I simply LOVED having the time to take a roadtrip with my dad. We had so much fun running all over the place and frankly just being childish. It was great. I'll never forget it.

The Game was not the only incredible thing I got to be a part of this week though. I also got the chance to see God do some pretty incredible things this weekend in Student Ministry. On Friday night we had some Turkey Bowling at the Crossing. I head it was a blast and we got some great video (I was with my dad up north so sadly I bowled no turkeys...). The coolest thing from the Crossing on Friday was some conversations our Volunteers had with Students. Our hope and prayer for the Crossing is that it will act as a bridge for students. That they will build relationships with us and other students that will introduce them to Jesus. We hope that for a lot of students that the Crossing is the start of their Faith Journey. Our goal is that they will end up connecting with one of our groups at Rel Community on Sunday Nights. This past Friday night 4 students talked with different leaders and sounded very eager about coming on Sunday Night (And They Did!)

One of the girls from the Crossing even came on Sunday morning and had a great time connecting with our girls in their Sunday morning group. It was great to see! On top of that our sign ups for CIY Believe started and our parents are in charge of the table for Sign Ups. They did a great job and were a huge help. That also freed me up to have the opportunity to chat with a couple of students about making good choices in their Faith Journeys. It was a great morning.

Finally the last thing we need to Praise God for about this weekend happened on Sunday night. We knew that 4 students had said they were going to come to Rel Community that night so we wanted to be sure to pray for them before Rel Community. Let me take a moment to say that we have great group leaders at Rel Community who are super committed to their students. They show up 30 minutes before RC to go over things for the evening and to spend time praying for the students and their groups. Well yesterday in our Pre-RC meeting time we prayed that God would already start working on the students who would be coming to Rel Community for the first time (Little did we know what God had in store for us!).

We finished our prayer time and headed over to the Crossing to greet the students as they arrived. Not only did the 4 students we had prayed for show up, but 8 other students came to the Crossing for the first time. Praise God! He answered our prayer in such an amazingly abundant way. The most incredible part though was how quality our group times were. We talked about Psalm 46 and how God is the Refuge and Strength for those who trust Him.

I just wanted to celebrate with all of you some of the cool things God let us be a part of this weekend. Please be praying for all of the students that showed up for the first time. Pray that God would be working in their hearts, and growing them. Pray that we see them again at Rel Community soon and that they would all experience the LIFECHANGE God has for them.

MS Retreat Video!

Middle School Retreat 2009 from Parkside Students on Vimeo.

Youth Ministry 3.0

I am reading a book right now by a guy named Mark Oestreicher who is the President of Youth Specialties. The book is a brief history of Youth Ministry, and then a brief look at where he thinks Youth Ministry is headed/Where it needs to go. Oestreicher does a great job of retelling the progress we have made in Student Ministry in the past 50 years. He also is very transparent about the mistakes he feels like he has made during his tenure in Student Ministry.

One of the sections in the book that stood out to me the most was a chapter entitled, "So... How Do We Get There?" In this chapter Mark offers up his thoughts on how Ministries need to adapt and grow how they minister to students. The part that really impressed me was when he talked about being communional (which is way to hard to say). He isn't talking about communion, he is talking about the process of really and truly doing life together. The reason he didn't simply say community, was because he didn't feel like that word summed up all that he was trying to say. Being Communional is not something that happens easily. Here is what he had to say.

Communion is Small
It bears repeating that communion rarely, if ever, occurs in a large setting.

Communion is Slow
It is not rushed. It doesn't happen over night- in fact it's annoyingly patient. Communion doesn't happen on our timetables at all, and it will internally resist all forms of quantification.

Communion is Simple
Not simple to create, but simple in its DNA. It's not flashy. It doesn't flourish with booster shots of technology.

Communion is Fluid
It won't be boxed or sold as a resource or presented as a 40 day plan. It shies away from being defined. It beautifully morphs into variant vibes, seasons, and shapes.

Communion is Present
It demands face time. It hungers for listening. It salivates for shared experience. It lives in the here and now.

(Excerpt from pg 106 of YOUTH MINISTRY 3.0 by Mark Oestreicher)

One of our big adjustments to Rel Community this year goes along the same lines. Last year we tried to put 3 adult leaders with every 12 students. They would meet together and we would tell the leaders to shepherd and mentor those 12 students. This year we still tried to do the 3 leaders for 12 students, but instead of just saying, "Be sure to saty in touch with this 12 students.", We went a step further. This year in each of our groups we are matching 1 leader up with 4 of those 12 students. It is a whole lot easier for a group leader to mentor and develop Rel Community with 4 students instead of 12. They still have group time with all 12 students, but during the week each leader just has around 4 students that they need to be sure to check in with, pray for, and encourage.

I am sure that this change will take some time to start working. I have already heard about some cool things coming out of it. What Mark Oestreicher said about communion being a tough thing to develop is true though. In student ministry our group leaders plant and water a lot of seeds with the hope and prayer, that it will lead to making a difference in a students life. They work really hard, wuth no guarantees that their work will pay off. That's why I appreciate our group leaders so much. They have faith that God will cause lifechange in students lives, if they keep pouring into those students.

Free Chick-Fil-A

I have the perfect place for all of you to eat as a family this Labor Day... That's right free food from Chick-fil-a! If you wear any sports logo into any location after 10:30am on this coming Monday, and you will get a free Chicken Sandwhich.

I'll definitely be going there for at least one meal that day.. who knows maybe too. Take advantage of this awesome FREE FOOD MOMENT!

Rēl Community

In just a week and a half Rēl Community is going to be starting up again on Sunday nights from 6-8PM. We are getting really excited about it too. Sign ups for the groups are going great, and its just time for everybody to start getting together again.

Some of the groups got together some over the summer, and others just touched base with each other. I think it is safe to say though that all of us are looking forward to getting back together. I've missed the dodgeball, and all the wierd challenges we had. I am excited about meeting new students, and planning events in our groups. I think one of the things I missed most about Rēl Community over the summer was just not getting consistent time to talk about different Bible stories, or about things we had all been going through with our group.

Thankfully we don't have much longer to wait (I am excited about the T-shirts that we will have this year too). We need to keep praying that God challenges us this year to grow in our faith. Its not just about showing up its about committing yourself to take that next step whether that is working on something in our own lives, or inviting a friend to group with us. September 13th is just around the bend and I am excited about Rēl Community finally being here.

Family Web Monitoring Service

Every now and then I come across something that catches my attention because it is different. The new web filtering software from Norton Anti Virus that they have made for families definitely qualified as different.

It's called OnlineFamily.Norton and here is what makes it different. Most web filters prevent people from accessing certain types of material (violence, videos, music, adult content). The filter acts as a fence that keeps children safe. The sad thing is that the filters tend to be hit and miss. Not only will they not stop things that they should, but they also tend to block a great deal of acceptable material. Norton has taken a little bit of a different angle. Their web filter won't necessarily block anything, but it does keep a record of all the sites that have been viewed as well as how long different users spent online. Thats still not what caught my attention.

Parents are given control over how much time students are allowed to be online for homework or for fun, and also lets them set parameters for what type of content is ok to access. When a restricted website is accessed, the filter will notify the parent by email, and let the student know that a guideline has been broken. At that point the student can include the reason the rule was broken in the automated email that will be sent to the parent. The whole goal of the software is to all parents to be aware of what all their son our daughter is into. I think they are doing it in a unique way. Check it out because it looks like a great resource.

Millennials Multitasking Capabilities

Stanford recently published their findings from a study they did on a group of 100 students. The study focused on whether or not America's youth can do more than one thing at a time and be more effective. For example, on most days in the office I will be listening to music and working at the same time. Studies have shown that I can't focus on both the music and my work at the same time. I end up switching back and forth from actually listening to my music and reading emails or whatever I am doing at the moment.

The reason Stanford did the study is that there has been a line of thought that young adults and teens might have developed the ability, because many of us are always texting, checking out facebook, and watching TV at the same time. The results they found though, showed that nothing has changed. We still can only focus on one thing at a time.

So as school starts back up and people just keep being so busy, we need to make sure we approach things one at a time. Its pretty hard to have a conversation with the TV on or while updating your facebook status. Stanford's study really brings home the truth taht in order to achieve something we are always going to have to be focused on it.